Keep Upward Improvement

God,.. I shocked already, and hopefully just for today. Ok, this will be a talk about my another future plan. I have already graduated from Dept. Engineering Physics Institut Teknologi Bandung-Indonesia (do you know?, I feel boredom to say this kind of sentence; introduce my self, explain my education background, recent status, etc.) and now it’s been 4 weeks I have been hold this reward called “Sarjana Teknik” and I can easily bend as of Bachelor of Engineering *maybe.

Realizing I’m not a patient person, those of my day has been colored with some activity to pursue many options and chances, especially Master program. And again, I realized I’m not a qualified person in dealing with study abroad requisite program. So on, within this circumstances, now I’m pursuing for master program in ITB, a beloved university in my home country (God, how I love this university –_-‘). Hence, when I have a passion to apply a study program of Engineering Physics ‘again’ I got nothing, yup a good news was a bad news because in the next semester there won’t be able some chairs in this Department in case of so many students has been pursuing this program, and the lecturers were tired to teach.

I’m still looking around and finally stopped in  Computational Science option, a new graduated school program in ITB. Again, at the same time I have a passion to apply, I also confronted in reality, ‘recommendation’. Just recently, my academic supervisor didn’t really supporting me to apply because in reality this program was a new program which still pursuing it’s definition, not yet developed and not yet well defined.

In the other words maybe he want to say, this program as not better as our program ‘Engineering Physics’. He was regret, because before I have an experience study in Osaka University namely 3rd best university in Japan. “I just knew this program was a double degree program” so students would have certificate degree from ITB and Kanazawa University-Japan. God, should I say to Kasai sensei that I’m interesting to apply QEDC in  Osaka ? am I really interesting? am I qualified enough to apply QEDC ? zzzz’’’’’

He also said that maybe I also should have a talk with my super-duper influence supervisor called Pak Her, but I’m not the lucky one ‘again’, he has pilgrimage now and will come back to Indonesia after the graduate school application deadline. One more to go, I also have a work in dealing with a second recommended person for giving me the letter of recommendation-tomorrow. My second final project supervisor called Pak Nug and I should brave my self to meet him, to see and hear his reaction.

You know, I’m not a stiff person who  can ignore people says, I was a brittle person who always having no regard what people’s said. What people say was so very influencing me. Sometimes I thought a lot, how such things can be allowed? too much thought to go on and maybe because I already realized that too much thought than action so I finally get ready to go. I need to get back my memory how I finally could trough my previous problems.

Again, I was happy and feels so grateful I was born to be a moslem, while I also realize I’m not even a good moslem who came up with a million excused. Again in this mature period I will always asking to Allah for the best way I should trough in my way life and of course I couldn’t only relax and taken easy to face something because I’m not an objective person, I was subjective with so many desire, and it’s not definitely true. That’s way time to time as a human I keep upward improvement. I will push my self till my lasting blood to be an objective, to be obey and keep moving forward into a define track whose God giving us. Hope Allah blessing me with a healthy and capability of thinking so I can through this life.

Thanks God for giving me a capability of writing this post, Be a honestly, sincerely, and obey person. Bismillahi rahman nir rahim and I shall have to go on.